Pray for the insecure!

Emails

2012-01-29T06:28:00.001-06:00

I have a lot of emails from folks. Some are in other countries!!! They're wanting some answers. Who wants these emails? I can't answer them. Private email me please so I can forward them to you. Thanks!

WOW

2012-01-29T06:22:00.001-06:00

To bad these hits aren't because of me!!

United States

942

Germany

122

Cayman Islands

117

Russia

Japan

United Kingdom

Argentina

Australia

Canada

Not my Joel!

2012-01-29T05:37:00.000-06:00

My Joel would NEVER. He's to big of a man. I'll have to delete those comments. I received an email explaining what that's all about. However I would like to point out the below. I have little to no respect for people who don't place 100% faith and value in the sanctity of marriage.

Dating a Married Man

Are you the "other woman?" If you're involved with a married man, and you're waiting for your turn, it's time to re-evaluate your situation. Dr. Phil offers advice:

It's time to move forward.
If you're putting your life on hold for a married man, he's not only stolen your heart " he's stolen your brain!

No matter how you justify it, you are attacking his family unit.
Even if he is separated from his wife, that is their business, and you are a threat to their marriage. You aren't welcome, and you don't belong.

You may feel that he's your soul mate but think again.
A real soul mate would not set you on the sidelines. He wouldn't allow it, let alone entice it.

Keep in mind that you only know what he tells you.
You already know that he's a liar, because he's living a lie with his wife and children. How can you be sure whether you're the only "other woman" he has? Entertain the possibility that he is lying to you, and you are being used.

Think of his wife.
Is it fair to her? She's been married to him for however many years, cleaned up after him when he's sick, raised children with him, sacrificed with him, dealt with the "damn dailies," then you come in at the 11th hour and provide a contrast to that that's new, and exciting and fun. You are intruding upon her turf. You are a trespasser. It is no different than being a thief in the night. It is no different than breaking into their house and stealing their things.

Even if your married man decided to leave his wife and family for you, that doesn't guarantee success.
Relationships born out of affairs survive less than 5 percent of the time. If he'll do it with you, he'll do it to you. If he's living this deception with you today, how could you ever trust him if you did get into a legitimate relationship with him?

Break off this relationship today.
You'll hurt, you'll feel broken-hearted, but you'll be better off. Take some time to get really clear with yourself about who you are and what you want. The most important relationship you'll ever have in this world is the one you have with yourself. And eventually, you'll fall in love again " with someone who's willing to make you first in his life!

2012-01-17T07:55:00.001-06:00

I'm feeling the love ya'll!

United States

934

Japan

Argentina

Germany

103

Thailand

A doll house every young lady can enjoy!

2012-01-17T07:10:00.000-06:00

Perfect for those who want a doll house for their girl(s) and can't afford one. These are super easy to make and add a lot of fun to the playroom!

http://familyfun.go.com/crafts/the-perfect-dollhouse-708726/

How to make paper air planes!!!

2012-01-17T07:07:00.001-06:00

My boys have been doing this for days. Nothing better than the simple things in life!

http://www.zurqui.com/crinfocus/paper/airplane.html

Horse Like Teeth

2012-01-17T07:05:00.000-06:00

Braces!! A must for every one who looks like a horse when they smile. Nothing ruins a sexy photo shot like a horse face resemblance! Wouldn't want to humiliate our partners now would we?

http://www.jxnsmiles.com/will-you-look-like-a-horse-in-ten-years/

How to Bleach Your Hair Platinum Blonde - wikiHow

2012-01-17T06:59:00.000-06:00

How to properly alter your hair. Over bleaching looks fried out and tacky. Almost ...almost as bad as neglected dark roots. If you can't maintain a good habit of updating your style then perhaps you should stick with your original or close to original hair color. Nothing screams tacky like over bleached hair with dark roots. My 2012 goal!!! Look less like trailer park trash!!!

How to Bleach Your Hair Platinum Blonde - wikiHow

SELF-Therapy: Couples - The Most Common Problem

2012-01-17T06:52:00.000-06:00

This article is fab. It talks about how the insecure and controlling spouse responds to daily activities. Much like when it's an 'all or nothing'. The passive spouse is unable to maintain any relationship with family unless the controlling spouse is center of attention. They often times have to 'share' facebook, email and blogs. The controlling spouse can't handle the passive spouse being an individual. Insecurity in ones self, choices and life lead to this.

SELF-Therapy: Couples - The Most Common Problem

Many Thanks!

2012-01-17T05:35:00.000-06:00

97 page views in less than 24 hours. Thank you! Also, thank you for the emails & comments! ~JMO

Signs of Insecurity (....An insecure woman who is seeking constant validation from others relies on her sexuality as a crutch. It becomes her main source of emotional energy and begins to define her.)

2012-01-16T10:31:00.001-06:00

One of the greatest challenges we face in our lifetimes is becoming comfortable in our own skin. A person who is secure with himself is much more likely to achieve success, have meaningful relationships, and be respected by others.
A person who is insecure finds difficulty in many aspects of life. Since most people are insecure, a person who is secure has power and influence over others; even if they are not otherwise powerful.
Coming to terms with who you are is the first step in obtaining happiness in life. The sooner you realize that happiness is something that you decide internally, and not something that you get from people or posessions; the sooner you will be able to create your own destiny.

A Lifelong Process

Everyone has some form of insecurity. It’s almost impossible to be 100% free of doubt. There have only been a handful of people throughout history who have obtained this level of confidence, and most of them have gone on to be great spiritual leaders. Now, we look up to them as role-models.
Confidence is usually a gradual process. It often comes with age and wisdom (although some people never find it). Those who work on themselves and gain confidence early on will have a much easier time navigating the challenges of life.

Insecurity is Destructive

Even though none of us are perfect; it’s easy to spot those of us who are overly insecure. Extreme insecurity is usually marked by an obsession with gaining the approval of other people. This level of self-doubt is extremely destructive to a person’s life and is often the root of almost all their problems.
More specifically, secure people find validation from within; while insecure people attempt to find validation from sources outside themselves. This external search for security manifests itself in two major ways:

overly selfish

overly accomodating

A Matter of Energy

I read one of the most eloquent explanations of why people behave the way they do in a book called The Celestine Prophesy by James Redfield. It’s a fictional adventure that tries to explain a few things about reality. The basic gist of the book is that we are all connected by an energy.
I read The Celestine Prophesy over ten years ago, and back then most people saw it as a little hokey. Today, the idea that energy connects us all is becoming mainstream, especially with the advancement of quantum physics and the cultural phenomenon The Secret.
Here’s the basic idea:

Signs of Insecurity

Here are some common signs that indicate insecurity:

Defensiveness

Insecure people tend to be very sensitive to critique and respond with defensiveness. They aren’t comfortable enough with themselves to accept that they might be flawed.
A secure person can handle criticism. They’re open to hearing about ways they might improve. If they disagree with the criticism, they don’t try to argue because they’re happy with who they are.
They’re comfortable enough to be themselves, even if other people don’t like it. They realize that they can’t please everyone.

Can’t Enjoy Silence

Some insecure people just can’t deal with silence. They fill every void with meaningless chatter, almost to avoid having to reflect on themselves. The unfortunate consequence is the annoyance of everyone around them, who secretly look for an escape.
A secure person can tolerate, and often enjoys silence. If they are with someone else, they have the ability to let someone else talk without having to interject their own perspective.

Excessive Joking

Another coping mechanism for insecurity is constant joking. While a sense of humor is almost necessary for emotional health, the excessive joker doesn’t seem to know the limits of appropriateness. (Think Michael Scott on “The Office.”)
It feels good when everyone laughs at your joke, and an insecure person craves this sort of attention. The unfortunate consequence is an uncomfortable environment and an insensitivity to others.
Jokes are almost always more funny when they are well-timed and delivered by a person of confidence. Security gives you the ability to be sensitive of others; knowing what they would consider funny and what they would consider offensive.

Self-Promoting

Insecure people tend to talk about themselves constantly, as if they feel like they have to prove themselves. Self-promotion is paramount to over-compensation for doubt.
A confident person doesn’t need to promote himself. His qualities are displayed naturally by the way he lives his life. Besides, he doesn’t need validation from anyone anyway.

Bullying

Insecure people feel threatened by others, and one way to cope with this is to try and squash them. The most threatening person of all to an insecure person is a secure person, because they can sense their power.

Overly Authoritative

Insecure people in positions of power tend to compensate for their lack of confidence by taking out their frustrations on their subordinates. They might issue unfair punishments or orders as a way to prove their authority.
I once had a boss who took joy in screaming at his employees, even for minor offenses. Once, I overheard him speaking to another manager about picking someone to fire for the fun of it. This kind of excessive authoritativeness is an obvious over-compensation for insecurity.

Overly Competitive

Competitiveness is part of a healthy emotional makeup, but over-competitiveness is a sign of a problem. Someone who can’t take losing by making a big emotional display lacks confidence.
A person who is secure with himself wins or loses with grace. Grace has a lot to do with respecting your opponent, and you can only do that if you are first comfortable with yourself.

Materialistic

A very dangerous coping mechanism for insecurity is buying things you can’t afford just to show off. We can all think of people with huge TV’s, fast cars, and every toy known to man; even though they don’t make much money. People like this tend to run up their credit cards and get themselves into big trouble.
A secure person doesn’t need to show off. He doesn’t care what other people think about his possessions.

Insecurity in Relationships

Insecurity tends to be amplified in relationships. In this situation, there is a constant struggle for control and energy.
Interestingly enough, people tend to be attracted to other people at the same level of security. Insecure people tend to find other insecure people to date, and secure people tend to date other secure people.
A healthy relationship is made up of two secure people who create their own emotional energy and give to their partner. An unhealthy relationship is made up of two insecure people who take emotional energy from their partner.

Men

Here are some characteristics of insecure men in relationships:

Irrationally Jealous

An insecure man is constantly worried about his girlfriend leaving him, and is extremely jealous. This manifests itself in constant questioning, mistrust, and altercations with other men.
A man who is secure with himself and his relationship is able to trust his partner. He can do so because he doesn’t depend on her for his well-being. He knows that he will be okay no matter what happens. If she betrays his trust, he is fully capable of either forgiving her, or leaving her to start over.

Abusive

Abuse is where insecurity in a relationship becomes extremely destructive. Men become abusive out of the need to control their partner. Instead of loving them for who they are, they try to force them into someone else.
A man who is secure with himself is never abusive.

Women

Here are a few signs of insecurity for women in relationships:

Stays in Abusive Relationships

Remember how insecure people tend to be attracted to each other? Unfortunately, this means that abusive men end up with women who take the abuse.
Have you ever known a woman who has had a string of abusive boyfriends? She ends up falling for one after the other. She has so little confidence that she is convinced that it’s her fault.
A secure woman isn’t afraid of leaving an abusive man. She knows that she doesn’t deserve that kind of treatment. She creates her own emotional energy and therefore she will be fine on her own.

Overly Sexual

Sexuality is a very powerful force, as evidenced by the amount of sexual images in our media. Men especially are strongly influenced by attractive women. Some women learn that they can get a lot of attention from men by flaunting their sexuality.
An insecure woman who is seeking constant validation from others relies on her sexuality as a crutch. It becomes her main source of emotional energy and begins to define her.
A secure woman doesn’t need constant validation. She is confident enough to define herself in many dimensions; not just one.
http://geniustypes.com/signs_of_insecurity/